Thursday, January 8, 2015

In One Minute Or Less

I'm reading The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin on my Kindle. I mention it's on my Kindle because it has the ability to highlight passages for later, and I've been doing that a lot with her book.

She talks about many inspiring things she does to be happier, including one that I've been trying to do with good success. Her idea is that if she can do a small task in a minute or less, to just do it. Throw away the candy wrapper on the floor you've walked by ten times. Refill the soap dispenser. Answer a quick email. Whatever it is that takes a minute or less.

I've been getting lots of little things done without taking up noticeable time. It helps free up your brain from trying to remember to do something and from feeling guilty about not doing something really easy.

So, give it a try if you want- if it takes a minute or less to do it, then just do it!

Thursday, January 1, 2015

More Empathy

People love to make goals for the New Year. Here is one that almost everyone could do better at and will make relationships better. Learn the power of empathy. This short video explains the difference between empathy and sympathy.

Sometimes with someone we don't know, the best we can do is sympathy. But for those you want a good, deep relationship, try some empathy. Get down in the hole with the person.

Learn to accept empathy and sympathy as well. Someone expresses sorrow by saying, "I'm sorry." The other person responds by saying, "It's not your fault." Not a great response. Instead say, "Thank you." In this case, saying, "I'm sorry,"  is expressing that they feel sad for/with you, not that they are taking the blame for it. Don't push their sympathy aside, just accept it graciously. As with a compliment, a simple, "Thank you," is usually the best response.

"It's not so much about sympathizing with people and making them feel better with things or with stories to please their ego. It's about getting to the core of things with people. Connecting with them, feeling what they are feeling, relating to them and bringing no judgement into the situation at all. Next time you are the ear that listens, provide words that don't fulfill an ego/mind story and see how much of a difference it makes for the other person." quote