Sunday, June 5, 2016

The Scariest Things

What are the scariest things to humans? Fear of the unknown and pain. People have stayed in misery because it's their known misery, they've grown accustomed to it, almost comfortable because it's understood or at least expected. People survive instead of thrive because they aren't sure how to change, or what will happen when they change. Will it actually be worth it? What happens if there is failure? What if I don't know what to do?

People won't truly change until they are ready for it, until they are in a place where they can make the change mentally and physically. How many people set goals or lifestyle changes only to fall back into their old habits. Some people make it through- drastic weight loss that stays off, change in eating and exercise habits that stays, complete change of personality, finally going for the dream instead of always planning.

It's hard, it hurts, there is failure, there are new and unexpected challenges, but moving to a higher plane is worth it every time, usually it's just a matter of time.

This weekend I went to lift a box I thought would be light but was actually quite heavy, and I was lifting improperly and felt something move in my lower back. According to the chiropractor my hip popped backwards out of place. If this has never happened to you, I greatly hope it never will.

My husband told me I was walking like a 90 year old woman, and I was because I was trying so hard to not feel the stabbing pain in my lower back. The spasms of the ligaments and muscles trying to protect the injured area made me want to just not move and hope it got better on its own. But of course that was unrealistic.

I went to a chiropractor and thought he helped but it still wasn't great. Then after a nap, I could hardly move without feeling the pain. I knew I couldn't stay on the bed and that I had to get up, but every move produced pain. I finally pushed myself through pain that hurt like hell and got myself to a sitting position then realized I couldn't move. I was crying, sweating, and breathing so hard. I yelled out to my husband and he helped me stand up and I took tiny baby steps to a chair where I cried some more.

My husband found a different chiropractor that would come into the office on a Saturday evening luckily, and I shuffled sideways to the car. The chiropractor was so patient and understanding of my reluctance to move, my crying, my mini break down, my fear. He took the time to figure out what was wrong and how to help me, but wouldn't proceed until I was ready. He managed to pop the hip back into place but let me know that I would still be in pain and couldn't really do anything for the next little while. He showed me how to sit down, sit up, lay down, move without too much pain. He also told me it will hurt to do normal things like brush my teeth, laugh, and even breathe sometimes.

It still hurts a lot, and I have to be careful but knowing how to take care of myself correctly, and mostly knowing that this too will pass helps. I know in a little while that I'll be able to cook, do the laundry, and more importantly, pick up my children when they want to be held. I'll be able to hug my husband without worrying about pain, and I'll remember to lift correctly.

My point with this long story? Sometimes you have to push through pain that hurts like hell and just trust that someday it will get better. Find someone that can help you deal with your pain correctly and follow their advice. Let others take care of you when you need it so that you can take of them when you feel better. Don't let fear of the unknown and pain hold you back from getting to a better place. Give yourself time for your wounds to heal. Just breathe, breathe deeply. Mostly, be thankful for misfortune that skips you, and grateful for what you do have in your life.

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