Monday, January 13, 2014

Silence Is Golden

I remember being at a girl's camp with my friends and it was getting near the end of the week. We were walking together all not talking but it felt comfortable. It's the first time I remember this quote applying well to my life. We were friends before, but during that week we had bonded to a deeper level.

My husband and I are this way too. We have hour-plus long drives frequently to visit family. Sometimes we talk the whole way, sometimes we are both lost in our own thoughts, usually it's a mix of the two, but it always feels comfortable.

An example of an uncomfortable silence between two people would be a date I went on years ago. A co-worker set me up with her nephew because she just knew we would be great together. She had him come to where we worked and introduced us, and I knew right away it probably wasn't going to go anywhere, but accepted the date anyways for her sake.

We talked in the car and in the line at the restaurant but the conversation was stilted. We finally got our food and found a table in the crowded noisy restaurant. He put his head down and proceeded to shovel food into his mouth until he was about half way through his meal. Then he looked up, asked how my food was, nodded that his was good also, then back down went the head until his food was gone. Then he insisted we go to a movie, so I agreed. At least no talking was expected during a movie. But there was a half hour wait until the movie started so we ended up walking around the mall, hardly talking, looking for a present for his sister. We ran into a friend of his and they talked for about ten minutes. Finally it was time for the movie. After the movie he took me home and we never spoke again.

It was awkward, especially when his aunt excitedly asked how the date was. Sometimes there are two good people, but they just have nothing to say to each other.

But then other times there are two good people, like my husband and I, that are just meant to be together. We talk, we are quiet, we plan together, we work together, we live together. It's a beautiful thing.

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